does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
i believe in u and ur pee
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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