The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
