Heybabeimwearingurpanties
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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