Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
tell me about the eggs
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
