Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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