he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
