how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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