I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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