she woke up with a sticky ear
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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