this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
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