Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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