guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
