She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Randomize
