Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
