chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
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