No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
