now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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