So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
