i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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