I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
