Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
