I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
