hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
