Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize