I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
