i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Can't talk, ducks in the car
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
