I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
