The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
