afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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