Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
