hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
