If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
you will always have a special place in my vag
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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