If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize