Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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