so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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