I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
