Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize