Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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