Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize