I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
dude i'm inner monologue high
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
