i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
He felt like a one man threesome
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Let's get the cat blown out
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
