yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
