Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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