There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
