uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
