that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
