You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize