How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
