I'm drive I can fine osifer
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
