For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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