when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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