Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
