Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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